ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
From the crime scene it appears that I attempted to throw up into a candle.
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It was one time. Now I have to constantly remind her my name is Jessica not Jizzica.
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Randomize
