i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize
