We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
My butt just had a miscarriage. It was yours. I'm sorry. You would have been a great sexually confused parent.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
He tried eating fireworks, to stop him being hungover in the morning. Where do you keep finding these people?!
It's almost like a boob-text, but it's not. Because it was live. And you were showing a bunch of people.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
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