Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
She texted me and said she was fingering herself. Don't respond to this because she's the perfect girl. I'd love to smell her cell phone after that.
I assume you meant to text someone else on your contact list instead of your own mother...
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Just so you know, if you are not feeling well today it's cause you drank a gatorade bottle full of highlighter fluid.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
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