thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
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is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
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Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
Two words: nipple clamps
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