I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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