Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
