He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
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I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He is dust bro dust in the wind I waited in this unlocked car long enough.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
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