That's intense
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
