Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize