what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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