I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
iPhone photo doodle is awesome. I gave my vagina some lazers and sent it to him. He has a whole series waiting on his phone for when he gets off the plane.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
Randomize
