Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
