he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
You can't be mad... I'm letting you jerk off in my parents shower
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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