haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
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