do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
Randomize
