i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
this just has baby written all over it
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
oh god was she eating orange peels again
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
I just had a flash of me drinking straight vodka out of a condom...
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
She had sex in a public bathroom and slept on a couch in the dorm lobby. It's only Monday
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
This is the second girl that said she wanted to fuck me while wearing a clown nose. Fuck online dating
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
