Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
You pole danced in your parka.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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