hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
