My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
