nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'll bring your "congrats on finally banging" cookies tomorrow, I'm exhausted.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
Randomize
