Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
We're shaving superhero symbols into our pubes. I call dibs on Batman.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Been using bowl smoking as a method of time for so long I don't know how long it actually takes to get to work
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