dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
They have 12 kegs and 40 bottles of liquor and a pool with a diving board. And hardly anyone at this wedding knows me. Should be a great night
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
This couple is walking their pig around campus
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