they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
