ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
so apparently we got drunk enough at the reception to rip the center pieces apart and use the flower vases as "fancy glasses"
she complimented my bra when we were hooking up. this lesbian thing has its upsides
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tell her a well fed dog doesnt stray far from the porch, and if that doesnt work just keep fucking her sisters
Not sure why I sent you a picture of a black bear last night but it seemed like a good idea at the time.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize