You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
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