well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
