My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Who died my cat blue again?
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
