I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
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