windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Sorry about last night..I didnt realize how drunk you were and when I closed the door it caused you to slam into the mirror...you'll probably piece together the puzzle when you read this and see your hand.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I walked into his room and he was naked with a half eaten pecan pie and a bottle of wine.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Randomize
