Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Only you could make a stripper uncomfortable by eye fucking her too much.
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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