Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
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