i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
Randomize
