I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Are you on your way? Get your date and black out with me. Democracy's at stake.
Randomize
