ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I always ask when they're due. It's the nicest way for me to let her know the rest of the world can tell she's putting on weight too
I also turned off the Anchorman DVD start menu before cause I didn't want Will Ferrel watching me lose my virginity.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
Randomize