Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize