Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Let's make a rule now, to not smoke weed out of our trumpets. After tonight.
Randomize
