Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Randomize
