i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
This is the Santa Claus of hangovers. It just keeps giving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Your ability to eat ass like its your job and yet turn down quinoa because it's "gross" is confusing.
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
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