Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
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