He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
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Princesses don't give blow jobs
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
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If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Apparently after I threw up I put my socks in the toilet......
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue