forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
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