Define "chronic" masturbator.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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