I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
Randomize
