turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I invented the best game. It's called "what touched my exposed nutsack?" It can range from pillows to toothbrushes
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
Spider-Man is making out with Wonder Woman while Captain Kirk feels up Princess Lea. Nice to see nerd barriers broken down at Comic Con.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
