We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
