Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Based on the fact my iPad is covered in pizza, I'm going to assume I ate pizza last night
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
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