What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Dear room mates I tried to shotgun pam in the kitchen. It is slippery. Please be careful. That is all. Love you.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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