You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
