That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
You've eaten a Lean Pocket for every meal for at LEAST 3 days now. Get your life in line.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
NEW RULE: can't hook up with more than 50% of the groomsmen in wedding party or it becomes wrong kind of weird. NUMBERS GAME.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
