Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I made my uber driver take a pit stop between clubs so we could restock on Xanax. #priorities
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize